Friends Recall B.A.R. Columnist Friday

Morgan Gorrono first met Wayne Friday three decades ago when he was a bartender at Uncle Bert's, a former gay bar in the Castro where the Mix is today, during his morning shifts. Friday, then working for the district attorney's office as an investigator, would pop into the bar.

The two political junkies quickly became best friends. Friday, who penned a political column for the Bay Area Reporter for 26 years, would be full of stories about which local politician or newcomer candidate was jockeying for a mention in his weekly "Our Man Friday" columns.

"I think they thought it was such a powerful avenue to the LGBT community through the B.A.R. to have Wayne mention them, and especially the higher up in the column. They actually jockeyed for it," recalled Gorrono, 57, a former San Francisco civil service commissioner who now lives in Alameda.

Many a conversation with Friday, said Gorrono, would start by him saying "You didn't hear this from me," or "Let me tell you what that queen did." Friday's wealth of political gossip would often find its way not into his own column but in that of the San Francisco Chronicle's Phil Matier and Andy Ross.

"Wayne was always a guy in the room and he surprisingly had a journalistic side of him that went past his advocacy," said Matier, who first met Friday in the 1980s. "If it wasn't something necessarily flattering about someone the B.A.R. was supporting, in his role as a political columnist I don't think he could help himself and Wayne would pass it on to someone who would get it out. There was a part to him that said it should be told no matter who it was about."

Friday never lost his love to dish about local politics, even as his health faltered over the last year due to Parkinson's disease. In an interview just days prior to his death by suicide Wednesday, October 12 at the age of 79, Friday was handicapping several local races on the fall ballot and predicting which candidates would jump into the 2019 mayoral race.

"Wayne was the gay Herb Caen," said longtime friend Ron Huberman, 70, a founding member of the Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Club and a D.A. investigator who worked with Friday, referring to the late Chronicle columnist. "Wayne's column in the B.A.R. was read by 90 to 95 percent of the gay community."

A bartender at long gone Polk Street gay bars N'Touch and the New Bell Saloon, Friday in the mid-1970s was elected the first non bar-owner president of the powerful Tavern Guild, formed by the owners of Bay Area gay bars and liquor wholesalers. He used the position to court the city's straight political leadership, who in turn sought out Friday's support of their campaigns and causes.

"Wayne being head of the Tavern Guild gave him tremendous power with the straight politicians. If you were a politician in San Francisco in the late 1970s, you had to court the gay community. We had huge numbers and we voted," said Huberman, adding that Friday "was very astute and aware of what was going on in those days."

Friday had been close friends with Harvey Milk and worked on his various campaigns for public office. Milk turned over his political column in the B.A.R. to Friday after his historic election to the Board of Supervisors in 1977.

During his time in office, Milk would submit items to Friday to include in the column. One time Milk used Friday's column to trash then-Supervisor Dianne Feinstein, as the two were at odds over a development near Ocean Beach.

"She was furious with me after a while for that," recalled Friday in a recent interview with the B.A.R.

The two grew close over the intervening years, and Friday often in his column would champion Feinstein, who was named mayor in the wake of the November 1978 killings of Milk and then-Mayor George Moscone by disgruntled former supervisor Dan White. While Feinstein's mayoralty roiled many in the LGBT community, particularly over her push to close the city's bathhouses in the wake of the AIDS epidemic, Friday remained a strong supporter.

"Wayne was one of the few people who got along with Dianne enough to reason with her," recalled Huberman.

Feinstein, now the state's senior U.S. senator, said she was fortunate to call Friday "a friend and trusted adviser," in a statement to the B.A.R.

"When I was first sworn in as mayor, tensions were growing between the LGBT community and police after the assassination of Mayor George Moscone and Harvey Milk. Wayne was respected by all sides so I knew I could rely on him as a mediator between the community and the department," stated Feinstein. "I'm grateful for his counsel during those tough times, which helped mend those fences. As a political journalist and a public servant, Wayne Friday fought for LGBT rights to ensure all voices were heard in San Francisco. He helped build a legacy of inclusion and acceptance that now defines our great city."

Friday was also very fond of, and close to, gay state Senator Mark Leno (D-San Francisco).

"Wayne was always supportive and encouraging of my public work and certainly always assisted in his political writings. He was the gold standard," said Leno, who at times would hit the bars in the Castro with Friday. "He paid such respect to bartenders. He was not a man of means but he was a big tipper. He made the bartenders feel good."

Upon learning of Friday's death, Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi (D-San Francisco) said the city had "lost a pioneering fighter for LGBT rights, a beloved journalist, and a dear friend. Time and again, on issue after issue, Wayne Friday was an early voice of vision and conscience urging a way forward for our city and for America."

Mayor Edwin M. Lee ordered flags to be flown at half-staff on City Hall, the police headquarters and the city's 10 police district stations from sunrise until sunset on Friday, October 14, in honor of Friday, who served as a police commissioner under Mayors Frank Jordan and Willie Brown.

"Wayne was a man of many trades; Navy sailor, stock trader, bartender, LGBT rights pioneer, police commissioner and political columnist. A true representation of the free spirit of San Francisco," stated Lee. "And although Wayne was not a native San Franciscan, his contributions to the community both as police commissioner and as a weekly columnist shedding light on the issues of the gay community make the city proud to call him one of our own."

A native of Flint, Michigan, Friday joined the Navy after high school and within a few years was working on Wall Street in New York City. In 1970 he moved to San Francisco and through the bar scene became friends with Bob Ross, who co-founded the B.A.R. in 1971 and named Friday its political editor.

He also gave Friday wide latitude in supporting candidates and politicians in his column, even if the paper had not endorsed them. Gay former District 8 Supervisor Bevan Dufty largely credits Friday's support of his 2002 candidacy in his weekly column as helping him win his race, especially since the B.A.R. endorsed one of his opponents and he was being attacked for having worked as a mayoral aide to Brown.

"He campaigned for me through that column. Every week he would find a new way to write about me," recalled Dufty, adding that "Wayne gave me credibility" with gay men in the district who were skeptical at first of his ties to the mayor.

The two rung in 2003 together and grew extremely close over the years. Dufty especially enjoyed hearing Friday reminisce about his bartending days and times with Milk.

"He was so wired politically. It was amazing all the people he knew and everybody that shared stuff with him," said Dufty. "I can't even count all of the items Phil Matier got out of him."

In addition to politics, Friday loved to talk about his love life, said Dufty. Other than a two-year relationship with John Robertson, a chef he dated in the 1980s, Friday remained single.

"He had a really healthy sex life throughout his life. I loved dishing with him about conquests and relationships," said Dufty. "He was never a neutered tabby. He was always on the hunt and had his eye out for gorgeous men. Even into his late years he scored very handsome men."

A memorial service for Friday is being planned for late November.