‘Heated Rivalry’ Stars Push Back After Jordan Firstman Calls Gay Sex Scenes “Unrealistic”

When actor and writer Jordan Firstman publicly dismissed the gay sex scenes in HBO Max’s hit tennis drama "Heated Rivalry" as “unrealistic,” he reignited a longstanding debate over how queer intimacy is portrayed on screen and who has the authority to call those depictions authentic.

In a recent interview with Vulture , Firstman—who currently stars in the series "I Love LA"—criticized "Heated Rivalry"’s portrayal of gay sex as overly stylized and disconnected from the experiences of many gay men, arguing that the show’s steamy sequences feel more like fantasy than lived reality. He framed his comments as part of a broader concern about prestige television leaning on eroticized depictions of queer bodies without, in his view, grounding them in character and context.

In the days following the interview, key cast members of "Heated Rivalry" responded in separate statements and social media posts, defending both the show’s creative choices and the diversity of queer sexual experiences. One lead actor said the intimacy choreography was developed through extensive consultation with queer writers, an intimacy coordinator, and community feedback, emphasizing that what counts as “realistic” can vary widely across LGBTQ+ communities.

Another cast member, speaking to Entertainment Weekly, noted that the series intentionally leans into heightened, sometimes operatic eroticism to mirror the show’s broader tone as a tense, high-stakes sports melodrama, rather than a strictly naturalistic drama. They argued that for some viewers, seeing unapologetically passionate gay sex scenes on a major platform is itself a meaningful step forward in representation, even if not every individual recognizes their own experience in what is depicted.

Series creatives also highlighted that the production employed an intimacy coordinator with specific experience working on LGBTQ+ storylines, with the goal of ensuring that the sex scenes centered consent, emotional truth, and actor safety, as well as erotic charge. According to production comments reported by Deadline, the team considered the sex scenes integral to the ongoing power dynamics and shifting alliances in the narrative, not merely decorative spectacle.

The back-and-forth has resonated far beyond one show, tapping into a larger discussion among LGBTQ+ critics, viewers, and creatives about the politics of queer sex on television. Commentators writing for outlets such as Them and PinkNews have observed that debates over “realistic” gay sex often reflect differing generational, cultural, and personal perspectives within LGBTQ+ communities, rather than a single, objective standard.

Some queer critics quoted in coverage of the controversy argued that calling a particular vision of gay sex “unrealistic” can unintentionally echo older respectability politics that asked queer storytellers to tone down erotic content to be deemed acceptable in mainstream media. Others welcomed Firstman’s critique as a reminder that representation should not be above criticism simply because it is rare or groundbreaking, suggesting that queer audiences deserve nuanced depictions that go beyond glossy surfaces.

Advocacy organizations focusing on media representation, including GLAAD , have long noted that LGBTQ+ characters are frequently denied complex romantic and sexual lives on screen, or are subject to sudden cutaways and censored intimacy. Against this backdrop, some media analysts see "Heated Rivalry"’s willingness to center explicit gay intimacy as a noteworthy shift, even as they acknowledge that not every stylistic choice will resonate with all viewers.

Several LGBTQ+ writers and showrunners interviewed in recent analysis pieces stressed that there is room for multiple approaches: from gritty, low-key realism to stylized erotic drama. They emphasized that queer creativity should not be confined to a single template of what is “authentic,” but that creators also benefit from listening closely to community feedback—especially when depictions risk reinforcing stereotypes or excluding transgender people, bisexual people, lesbians, and other identities from the center of desire.

Media scholars cited by The Hollywood Reporter added that debates like the one surrounding "Heated Rivalry" can be productive when they foreground questions of consent, body diversity, and emotional complexity, rather than focusing solely on whether scenes are “too explicit” or “not explicit enough.” They pointed out that as streaming platforms expand global reach, decisions about how queer sex is portrayed influence not just entertainment value but also broader social attitudes toward LGBTQ+ people.

As the conversation continues across social media platforms including Instagram and X , cast members of "Heated Rivalry" have reiterated that they welcome robust dialogue from LGBTQ+ audiences while standing by the show’s choices. Firstman, for his part, has not retracted his comments, but coverage of the dispute has underscored that no single voice can—or should—speak for the full spectrum of queer experiences on screen.